Teenage Girls: Have I messed everything up, or is there still hope for us?? (sorry, pretty long)?

I hate it that you got to a point that you felt that there was nothing left to do, but to end your own life. But I believe that if you really wanted that then you would be dead now.. I think that you are dragging what seems like a wonderful young woman through a very difficult part of your life, If I were you I'd let her know that you were getting help and that you love her. Tell her that you want her to know how you feel and if shes interested then you'll wait! You don't want to seem like a stalker, you've already done something that is very scary so don't make it worse.. You can't force her to love you!! So in the meantime work on your self you have to love you, before you can have a good relationship.. Hon I wish you all the luck in the world I hope you find a reason to live that doesn't just involve a girl though!!